The appropriation of BDSM imagery is problematic because while community members understand that it is important to be sensitive to the needs, boundaries, and rules of players in order for a scene to function fairly and enjoyably, mainstream porn is primarily about getting off as quickly as possible. Add to that a disgraceful lack of sexual education (both in safety and in pleasure) across the country, and a general belief perpetuated by the media that women are sexual objects to be consumed, and you have a rape culture that started by borrowing from BDSM’s imagery without reading its rules.

sweetcalamity:

[If you really wanted fewer abortions, you would make birth control easily attainable, prosecute rapists, fight for comprehensive sex education in schools.

If I want to get an abortion, I will get one. You are just voting to make it unsafe. (How very “pro-life of you.)

No shame, no fear. My body is mine to love and control.]

(Source: katzecatchat)

Word Of The Day: Clitoral hood

thecsph:

Did you know that what most people think of as “the clitoris” during play is actually just the clitoral hood? The clitoral hood is akin to the foreskin on a penis - a fold of skin that surrounds the glans and shaft of the clitoris itself. It serves as a protective hood over the glans, which is filled with nerves. Most vagina-owners find the glans of the clitoris to be too sensitive for direct stimulation, and prefer instead for it to be touched through the clitoral hood. Seriously, partners, take note of this.

In the above image, (1) is the hood alone (the glans is completely concealed), while (2) shows the glans itself - where all the fun clit sensations spring from!

The clitoral hood can generally glide back and forth over the glans without it feeling abrasive. However, some hoods are permanently attached or bonded to the clitoris - which isn’t unhealthy and does not affect sexual sensation. Surgery to separate the hood from the glans exists, but is usually unnecessary and unwise - why mess with what you’ve already got?* 

If you’ve ever found clitoral stimulation to be “too intense” or “too much”, try rubbing or vibrating through the clitoral hood instead for better results. There are surprisingly few sources online and in print that discuss the clitoral hood, but it’s a pretty crucial part of the magic that goes on around your clit. 

*Source:Guide To Getting It On, 6th Edition, pg 89, Paul Joannides

Nobody told me I had a clitoris. Nobody told me I was capable of having orgasms. For five years I was given “sex education”. It mostly consisted of periods and condoms. It didn’t talk about consent. It didn’t talk about the actual mechanics of sex, about arousal and lubrication and oscillation. It didn’t tell me a single thing about relationships and it didn’t tell me I had a clitoris. I only know now because of the internet. Nobody entrusted with my care and education has ever told me that the female orgasm exists, or about the parts of my anatomy necessary for it. I didn’t find my clitoris until I was eighteen, after six years of active sexuality. That makes me angry.